I’m a storyteller so naturally when I thought of my experiences exploring myself a story came to mind. I can’t really explain it, but I’ll try my best to create a correlation between what I experience and that of Alice in Wonderland. Although I have to admit you may never look at Alice the same.
My journey of self-exploration began when I was a 14 year old teen immersed in an over sexed high school. Everybody was having sex and experiencing it for the first time, but I had decided I would wait until I was married. Still, I couldn’t shake the growing desires that my body naturally triggered. I became curious about this pleasure that everyone spoke of. I wanted to know what it was like. Never would I imagine that the key to unlocking Wonderland and the door to my journey of self-love lied in the tip of a manicured finger. I experienced my first orgasm and learned the rhythm of what my body liked most, but I still had my reserves. For me the answer lied in the clitoris, the magic button and that alone. I was neglecting the rest of my body because masturbation was just a quick way for me to get off and overcome the temptation to have sex. As I got older it became so much more. I realized I needed to know myself better. I had touched myself plenty of time and experienced pleasure on several occasions but when the sight of the rabbit caught my attention I knew there was new territory to explore.
I was curious much like Alice as she followed the late rabbit into the hole. I had a rabbit of my own except mine wasn’t furry and white or cute and cuddly. It was a shiny, blue rubber bunny that fit in the palm of my hands. It looked harmless, but it had as much power as the Queen of Hearts.
As I sat in the warm waters of my lavender bath with bubbles, I closed my eyes and laid my head back as the low buzz of the bunny filled the room underlying the music I had playing in the background. I closed my eyes as I chased the rabbit down the hole in search of this new land that I didn’t know existed; my leg slowly easing its way up the side of the tub. Feeling the musical vibrations and the pinot noir coursing through my veins, I fell, took a tumble down the rabbit hole as time stopped. Toes curled and back arched, I chased after the rabbit that was sending me down a dark abyss of pleasure.
I was much like Alice. I had no idea where I was going, but the anticipation wouldn’t stop me from following something so unusual. My curiosity had gotten the best of me and as I laid back and let this blue rabbit show me the way to Wonderland the warm water created tiny waves lapping at my clitoris. As I got closer to the bottom, I felt my blood rushing and the friction of the buzzing rubber created a buildup. My legs spread wider until my ass is lifted off the bottom of the tub. My heart skips a beat and I inhale deeply as the scent of my lavender water fill my flared nostrils. My chest moves up and down as I moan and suck in air through grit teeth. One flick of the wrist and the rabbit catapults me into Wonderland.
As I hit the bottom the rabbit sends my body into a frantic spasm and I squeeze my eyes shut. I had unlocked the door to Wonderland and landed in a field of dewy flowers. Dewy flowers much like my moist punani. As my body reached a stable equilibrium, I realized I was on to something. I was in control. Like Alice, I was unaware of the power I possessed. I had discovered Wonderland and began my journey of self-exploration. It was my sexual awakening.