I am at a place of burnout at the moment. I’ve done less blogging this week, I’ve done less freelancing this week. I’ve worked on my teen fiction less this week. I’m unmotivated to finish the mystery book I’ve been reading no matter how good and suspenseful it is. My dress attire has been reduced to a combination of t-shirts, jeans, and sweatpants and leggings. My eating this week has been handfuls of pretzels, chips, candy, cakes, cookies that have created a bit of fluff in my mid section.
Each morning I wake up there’s a moment of peace immediately interrupted by a massive flow of Slack alerts for Saint Heron with pitches for the day, responses, conversations. There’s a massive load of emails, mostly junk and the more I delete, the more appear. There’s the daily aggravation of a nine year old that’s a serious pain in my behind and most days I just want to pack up and leave it all behind. Phone, laptop, everything. It began yesterday morning. I didn’t charge my phone the previous night so by morning it was already on 10 percent. Now usually because my freelancing days are so hectic, 10% would’ve driven me up the wall and I would’ve been dashing for my charger, but yesterday, it died…and I had no desire to charge it. I turned my phone off for a day because I needed peace and rest. I needed to separate myself from the very thing that consumed most of my day. With freelancing I spend most of my day surfing the web for trending topics, breaking news, or ideas that would be great for the platforms I write for. Then it turns into pitching those ideas to groups via mobile phone and getting feedback. Imagine myself and about 30 other people in a single network doing the same thing. It’s notification overload from sun up to sun down. Buzzing, vibrating, pinging all day and night. I try to focus on one thing, I’m getting alerts for another things. Then once a piece is published, I have to log into my social media accounts for self-promotion and then the notifications letting me know people are reading and commenting on my work is all day and at random. So I had to shut my phone off.
I didn’t Google search articles and tips on how to motivate myself or how to get out of the rut that I was in. I let myself sit in it for a day and promised myself I wouldn’t let my next day be the same. So during that time without my phone to disturb and interrupt my peace, I slept, I actually got over the teen fiction hump and finished a chapter, I watched TV, slept some more, went for a walk, listened to music in the dark and read my book. I made the day about myself and not what I had to do for others. I just needed a mental escape because I was drained. I found myself fatigued all the time and sluggish. So I just needed to hit a reset button which begins today. I realized how much technology consumes me and how I need to be more conscious of managing it for the sake of my own mental health.
I think I want to start implementing this into my self-care days once a week. Turning my phone off, turning my laptop off and picking up a book and going on more nature walks.